Have you ever just sat in your car parked at your destination and wondered how in the hell you got there?
Like barely remember the drive, maybe bits and pieces flash of the ride. The traffic or a song that was on the radio is now stuck in your head on repeat.
I would compare that feeling of how did I get here daze to life after being divorced and trying to start over.
I have been officially divorced now 17 months now, that's 1 year and 5 months, well it's just shy of that...on the 30th of this month it will be 17 months. And honestly it's been a shit show...if it was one of those recap of last season moments that they show before a new season starts....the highlights (or low lights really) would be hard to watch.
I have put my head, my heart and my sanity through the ringer and I mean, I am here. I'm writing this right now, but it's a daily struggle to keep positive verses linger and hold on to the past. Even then my past baggage will pop it's ugly head up and I will deal with it as best I can. Forcing a smile on my face at times...or gritting my teeth and plunging into the drama and hope that I can resurface in one piece.
I have decided it's time to blog because I can only blow up my besties cell phone so many times.
My family, love them, but they are over any drama I have (which totally understand) they dealt with it all when I dated, got married and got divorced. You can really only expect your family to be able to handle so much, I have learned that everyone who loves you has a threshold. And totally no judgement, I get it..and I love them for it.
I hope that anyone else that is 30 something, uncertain of what they want to do with their life..or what they want to be when they grow up. That are at a point where they need to restart, knowing that you are not alone will bring you a little comfort.
And for me, it's a way to check in and see what is really going on. Even if it is via social network..not on my own personal network...but still better out than in right?